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Hey Kathy I'll investigate your hip and upper thigh for you as I know what damage stairs can do to them. I'll bring two lots of cream with me as well, first tub of cream will be smeared over the injured parts and thoroughly rubbed into the affected areas. Second tub of cream will be ice cream and the flavour will be of your choosing, we can demolish that while I'm teaching you how to speak cockney English, example of a cockney accent is spoken by the oldish gent in the link.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4VFqbroi1I